silly expectations & entitlement

I love my dishwasher. lalalala love! I love that it has lots of places for different types of dishes and that it has enough room in it for the dishes that I really don't want to wash by hand. I love that I only have to half-clean most of my dishes before putting them in the dishwasher. I love all the settings...the list goes on. Wanna know what I love most? That it hides dirty dishes AND cleans them while I'm sleeping. Talk about efficient. Awesome.

Nothing says, "Cheryl, you're going to have a wonderful day!" like a clean kitchen and clean dishes just waiting to be used in the morning!
Or, "Wake up, Cheryl! This is the day that the Lord has made and He also made your dishwasher!"

Praise the Lord for appliances, right ladies?!

However, I'm sure you've all been there...but have you ever had one of those crazy-busy days where the dishes just pile and pile and somehow you manage to end the day without doing them and miraculously the angels of Heaven do not come down and wash them in the middle of the night?...(rabbit trail) Have you ever seen the movie "The Sword in the Stone" where the dishes wash themselves?!?!?!?! I bet that's how Heaven is...OR the women who love doing dishes will do them, but either way, my heaven-assigned placement for His glory will not be at the sink.
(alright, bring it back Cheryl)

Ahem*
So, this busy day ends, the next day comes and you walk into your kitchen where the dirty dishes are literally on every surface and you don't even know where to begin. This happens almost weekly in my home, and yet, I'm still a little surprised (and overwhelmed) every time.
Why did I expect the dishes to be clean? Why did I think my kitchen would be organized and ready to use? I didn't clean it. I didn't wash anything. Oh yeah! And I love to somehow blame my family for this?!
This isn't about cleaning your kitchen or whose fault it is that something didn't get accomplished. This is about the expectation that we have of deserving something we didn't work toward having. And it's also about blaming others for our lack of good choices.

There's an entitlement movement that is paralyzing our young people right now. This sense of getting something we want regardless of having sacrificed anything to earn it.

We want a great friend but are not loyal ourselves. We look forward to having a happy marriage but do not choose to be attracted to the qualities that matter. We want the management position but blame others for our lack of hard work. There are so many examples that come to mind but since my first priority of ministry is my marriage, I'll focus this message on the most important relationship we have with another human.
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How can we expect to have a husband who is faithful if we are not faithful ourselves? Or if we don't value faithfulness in looking for a husband?
I know many young ladies who choose to fancy a lad that doesn't display the desire to love the Lord first but even going a little more practical, doesn't love his family? Doesn't have a longing to do what is right? I think it's interesting that most ladies want a man to be pure in his thoughts and actions, to be someone they could have a lasting relationship with, but yet they'll shiver with excitement when a hooligan-young whippersnapper comes along and tempts them with words, promises, flattery, inappropriate touching or joking, etc. And yes, I said whippersnapper and hooligan because I am 85 years old.
Really ladies?!
Are you really that easy?
The answer is yes. Your heart shouldn't be your guide. I don't care how he makes you feel.
You don't deserve to have a good marriage if you're not willing to sacrifice worldly pleasure for holy matrimony.

Take that in.
This is mostly for the single, young ladies out there. A warning for your future if you currently are being driven by your heart.

The Bible says in Jeremiah 17:9 "The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure."...this is scary. The world tells us to follow our hearts, guess who that is talking? Not the Lord.

Reality check: why are you entitled to something you haven't worked for? Why should a student deserve an "A" if they're acting like a "B" student or even a failing student?

If you think you deserve the management position in your workplace, act like it! Show up early, leave late, work hard, and get along.
If you want a true friend, be a true friend. Call, write, pray, meet, etc. Be there for them in times that it is inconvenient for you. Think of them first.
If you want a marriage that is joyful, close, understanding, and forgiving, be these things first. Look for the hint of them in a young man, but more importantly look for a man who desires to please the Lord first and most. DON'T look for a guy who follows his heart.
If you have a hard time being a hard worker, good friend, or wise young woman - Seek the Lord. Matthew 6:33 says, "Seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you."

So, guess what? Your focus might be off.

And for the married woman, guess what? You're married.
Be married. Stop acting single. Or worse, stop desiring to be single. Celebrate your marriage by being the type of spouse you'd like to have. Seek after the Lord for reassurance, companionship, and love. And after the Lord has satisfied you (and believe me, He will), anything your spouse does that is loving will just be an added bonus.

Stop talking about what you deserve. Instead, shift the focus to what you are doing to deserve what you want.

Meanwhile, I'm going to go wash my dishes. :)